Have some fun

Sports are supposed to be fun. They are also supposed to be difficult and challenging. I think one of the greatest things about being an athlete is learning and understanding that all of those things can coexist. Difficult isn't equated with miserable. Challenging should be something to look forward to.

But sometimes we get caught up in the emotion of the season and we get sidetracked a bit because we want so much for it all to go well. And that's okay. Its rare to find an athlete that isn't striving for greatness and experiencing some road bumps along the way. That's part of the journey.

But the journey is also about having fun. And I challenge all of you to get back to having fun. Take one practice and MAKE it fun. Sure you might have stresses and disappointments, pressure and failures. But in the midst of all that- have fun! Make it your personal goal to play as hard as you possibly can and enjoy every single second.

You'll be surprised how well you play simply by letting go and having fun. Try it and then post some comments on how you felt, what you noticed, how you experienced practice.

Finding the love

As February approaches, its a good time to remind yourself why you play your sport. For basketball players in particular, there can be a bit of lull in enthusiasm during this time. You might be tired, mentally or physically, and you might be content in your position in your conference. Maybe you've gotten complacent in winning or comfortable in losing. March Madness is right around the corner but it can feel like a distant goal, unrelated to the work you do daily.

So ask yourself some questions:

Why do I play this game?
Am I having fun?
Am I grateful for this opportunity?
Do I fully appreciate being healthy and getting to play?
If the season ended tomorrow would I feel like I gave this game and this team all that I have to give?

The season is long and you have a lot of pressure and responsibilities. The goal is not for this time in your life to be easy; the goal is for you to enjoy the difficult times and make them fun. I look back on college as probably the most difficult, challenging time in my career but by far the most rewarding. Live in the challenge and enjoy it.

Sports in the midst of tragedy

Like most Americans, the past week has me thinking and feeling maybe a little deeper or a little longer than normal. Regardless of your political affiliations, I would imagine that President Obama's Tuscon Memorial Speech probably verbalized at least some of those thoughts and feelings. If you haven't watched it, I recommend getting some tissue out before you do.

As I've reflected on this tragedy, I've thought a lot about the role of athletics. After all, sports are a way to unite people, but also a way to choose sides, they are a way to distract ourselves but also a way to play out our emotions in the safety of a game. Sports play a huge role in our society; in happiness and grief, in remembrance but also in regaining normalcy. There are examples all over the world of people finding ways to play in the midst of war and conflict, athletes risking their lives to travel to games, soccer games played despite mines and bombs.

But in the grand scheme of things, how can teams and athletes focus on game in the shadow of death? And even should they be expected to? Do fans even care about a game in the wake of tragedy?

The answer is probably no to all of those, which is why the Arizona/Stanford men's game was delayed. For that day, American's just wanted to be in shock, to talk about the trauma, to share in our collective grief. It was a time to heal, not to move forward.

Ultimately though, I think the real value in sports is that it helps us move forward incrementally. Grief doesn't move on a continuum, its more like waves or peaks and valleys. So when we play or watch sports, we can leave our grief for awhile, not because its not important, but because its a process that involves both reflective time and outlets. Sports don't have to compare to real life and death, it just has to serve a purpose in our healing.

So in the midst of tragedy, athletes can heal by regaining a sense of control of their world through their game. We may not be able to prevent a crazy person from pulling out a glock on innocent people, but we can move our feet on defense or high five our teammate after they dive on the floor for a loose ball. We might not feel safe after a terrorist blows up a plane but we can shout out in exhilaration after a 3 point play or feel a part of something greater than ourselves in the pregame huddle. We might not be able to wrap our minds around death or the loss of innocent bystanders, but we can give all we have. And by playing our hearts out even in the midst of tragedy, maybe we give the fans something to feel good about. And if nothing else, while the world around us seems thrown off, we can lose ourselves in the game, if only for a few hours.

Self Talk Reminder

Self talk is our most important weapon because its our strongest and most consistent way to program our subconscious. You probably aren’t even aware how busy your internal dialogue is but its estimated that we say 50,000 words to ourselves daily. These words don’t just drift into thin air, they work to make up our subconscious picture of ourselves which then in turn affects how we perform and behave.

So what are you saying to yourself? For the next day try to be aware. You might even want to put a rubber band on your wrist (or wear your BAVS to BRICS wristband if you have one) to remind yourself to pay attention. Awareness is the first step to change.

Many people speak to themselves in a way they would never speak to someone else. And if someone else spoke to them that way, they would be deeply offended. So why do we beat ourselves up with negative language?

I don’t have the answer to the ‘why’ but I do know that if you are using derogatory language in your internal dialogue you MUST stop. It is not helpful or even possible to tell yourself you are bad player and then go out and play well. Its not helpful when you make a mistake to compound it with negative language.

But let me elaborate- this isn’t about living and playing with rose colored glasses on. You can acknowledge failure and mistakes, you just shouldn’t beat yourself up about them; you should never let them define you unless you want them to be repeated. Which is why I teach post-game critiquing vs. criticizing which you learned in MPT Advanced Core Curriculum and we’ll go into later again. But this should be known- there is a time and a place to analyze play and its definitely NOT while you are playing.

Affirmations in the New Year

One of the things I like best about MPT is that it allows athletes to really decide what THEY want; not what their parents, or friends, or coaches or fans want. No outside force can make a person want to be their best; nothing can motivate a person for 5:30 am weight lifting better than a goal that they set for themselves.

I truly believe that satisfaction in life comes from setting and attaining goals in a purposeful and healthy way. I don't think we always need to strive for the absolute best, only our best; we don't need the most success in the world, the most money, and certainly not perfection to be happy and fulfilled. But moving forward and being productive is what we are wired to do and what ultimately gives us the most satisfaction in our life. Obviously, this is not limited to athletics but if that is where you are devoting yourself, you might as well give it your all.

And so back to affirmations- setting our goals in the present tense and giving ourselves a clear visual of where we want to be so that success becomes easy and natural. Have you been doing your BAVS (Breathing, Affirmations, Visualization, Self Talk)? And most importantly, do your affirmations give you a clear visual? Do they motivate you? Are they working? If not, its okay to change them; they are for YOU and they should be something that helps you everyday become clearer about the work you are putting in; they should be enjoyable, sobering at times because they can remind you that you have some work to do, but ultimately helping you move forward in a positive way.

Happy New Year!

Blogging!

Hi all. I've spent the last five years blogging about playing professional basketball which has been an amazing way of connecting with people all over the world. I'm now happy to announce I'll be blogging about the mental side of the game. This is of course what I'm talking and writing and speaking about all the time anyway-from strangers on the plane, to friends, to coaches and players all over the country. The great thing about Mental Performance Training (MPT) is that it really applies to everyone and everything. A ballerina preparing for a performance is similar to a salesman getting ready for a big presentation which is similar to a basketball player lacing up for a big game. The mental process to be successful and perform to the best of YOUR ability is universal. Which is why a number of employers seek to hire athletes and ex-military people; they've learned to perform when the pressure is on. This blog is devoted to that special and no longer elusive thing- performing to your potential consistently.